Dom Diaries: Tangled up in you Read online

  I grab a beer from the refrigerator, twist the cap off and lean against the counter. Javen’s question from earlier crosses my mind. I sometimes want to find that one special girl and other times I am happy I'm single. It is not easy to find the kind of woman who can give me what I want and fulfill my desires.

  I have a healthy appetite for sex. I'd probably have it a couple times a day if my life would permit it. The career I chose, however, interrupted that, but that isn't all. When it comes to finding the right partner, that is a bit of a problem. I don't just strip my clothes off, stick my cock in a pussy and be done. No, I need a girl who lets me control her. I have to be in charge of her pleasure, her body, and her orgasm. Trust is a huge factor with the things I like to do. Of course women will let you give them an orgasm because what woman doesn't want one. As I said, trust is the tough one. That isn't handed out on a one night stand, maybe after a couple of weeks if you are lucky. See my dilemma? Abbott Easton doesn't do relationships very often. So, if a girl doesn't trust you, she sure in hell isn't going to let a dominant as myself do as he pleases. Orgasms don't happen if you fear the way it's given to you. I always have the club when needed, but that sometimes feels too staged.

  I check my watch. It's just a little after seven. I have an open night and I haven't been to Unlimited in a while now that I think of it. It might be just what I need. I check my watch again. Literally a minute has passed. Fuck it. It's early and I can be back by midnight and get some sleep in before I have to be at Keets place. I leap from the chair, grab my keys, jacket and helmet.

  I am greeted at the door by a woman I'd say is in her thirties. Her skimpy outfit doesn't work for her. It's over the top if you ask me. I get my wallet out and show her my membership card.

  She hands over the guest book and I sign my name. She smiles and I nod. I go to the left because it's the private side. The other side is more of a strip club. The whole cover up of the real purpose of Unlimited. I have been to a few different locations, not all of them have a strip club open to the public.

  “Would you like a private table?”

  “Yes, please.”

  The girl takes me to a booth. I slide in and tell her I'll have a bottled beer. “Would you care for company tonight or is someone joining you?”

  My eyes rake over her body. “I'm set for right now.”

  “Very well. I'll be back with your drink.”

  She leaves and I set my helmet on the table and then remove my leather jacket. I lean back, making myself comfortable, and watch the show on stage. It isn't the typical viewing tonight. Not very often do you see two females on stage. It's not that female on female Dom/subs don't exist, because obviously they do. It's just they don't normally want to be center stage.

  “Your drink, sir.”

  She sets my beer down and leaves me without another word. I skip using the frosted glass she also brought with her. If I wanted a glass, I would have ordered a draft.

  I put my focus back to the stage. It's not really doing anything for me besides me wanting to go up there and take over. I don't mean any disrespect of the two women, but a woman dominating another woman isn't what I came for.

  I scan the room. I see couples in play. Some of the ladies are collared and a few are not. You can spot a well trained sub a mile away by their posture. My eyes stop moving when I catch a pair of brown eyes staring at me. She cast her head down as soon as I caught her, however, she peeks through her lashes to see if I had moved on. She moves closer to her Dom, knowing she desires my hands dominating her. She isn't collared, so I would assume it is a new relationship or she isn't getting what she needs from her master. I look back at the stage. I do not yearn to be in the middle of a troubled relationship.

  I finish my drink and I'm ready to get out of here. The show tonight is not my scene. The eligible ladies aren't making my palms tingle with excitement. Nor are they doing anything for my manhood. So, I pay my tab, and am ready to leave. I'm approached by a couple on my way out. They ask if I want to join them. The Dom wants to watch while I dominate his lady. I politely decline and make my exit from Unlimited.

  Chapter Five

  It's four in the morning and once again, I wake covered in sweat from another dream. I saw her back, her ass and then the side of her face as she looked over her shoulder. That's all I can remember, but I know who she was. I haven't thought about her for so many years. The day I left that Amish farm, I knew I would never know her name again. I also know I would never see her again, either. She is just another part of my past that I moved on from. Jenna Parkinson was the hardest to move on from, though. It took me months to get over losing her. I missed her smile, her hair, her eyes and her laughter. Hell, I missed everything about Jenna. The only thing that made me stop thinking about her was the police academy training.

  I reach behind me and grab my pillow. I punch it, pull on it, and punch it again, then toss it back to the bed. I fall back to the mattress and turn my head to see my alarm. Two hours, I need two more hours of sleep. I roll over and bury my face into my fluffed pillow, hoping I can just sleep. No dreams of my past life, no dreams of work, just goddamn sleep. I close my eyes tightly and think about my ride today. That was peaceful. Something I wish I felt more often.

  I reach out a hand, slapping my snooze button. Fuck, just when I get back to sleep. I hug my pillow tight. Just a few more minutes is all I need.

  “Wake up, sleepy head.”

  “No, I'm tired.”

  “Too bad. You know he'll be up here in less than five minutes.”

  I jump from the bed startled. I look around my bedroom, looking for her. I use the heel of my palms to rub my eyes. My alarm sounds, bringing me back to reality. I walk over and swing my arm, knocking my alarm clock clean off my nightstand. I hit it so hard, the cord came right out of the outlet. I sit on the edge of my bed. My past is haunting me. It's messing with my head. Why now? Why at this time in my life is all this resurfacing? I am barely free from all my responsibilities and this shit comes back. It's been years since I put this all behind me. I buried it deep down inside me and thought it was gone for good.

  My phone rings. It's got to be Keets making sure I'm up for our four day weekend away. I bend and swipe my phone up off the floor. “I'm up, Javen,” I say immediately.

  “I'm Javen this morning. You best not be backing out.”

  “You got that by me calling you by your name?”

  “No, I got it from your tone of voice.”

  “I'll be at your house in half an hour.” I hang up and sit here a few minutes longer.

  I am seated next to Justin in the back of the Keets's car. I was tempted to just follow them on my bike, but the weather is calling for a morning rain. We might have been out of the area before it hit, but I wasn't willing to chance it. Riding when you are soaking wet isn't all that fun.

  I listen as Olivia tells us all about the house we are renting. It sounds real nice. I'm happy to hear that it is spacious. I'm a bachelor and I'm used to having my own space. I've lived on my own for the last twenty-four years.

  “Hey, you two have never told me how you ended up on SWAT together.”

  Keets loves telling this story. “Abbott was in his first year being in the police force when I met him. I knew I had to get him on the team. I talked to the superior officer and he said he already had his eye on him, so a week later he was recruited to be on the FBI SWAT team. The rest is history.”

  “Wow, impressive, Abbott. Only a year.”

  “I know, I got lucky.”

  “Luck had nothing to do with it. It was your drive and dedication.”

  “Okay, boys, let's not talk about your work history all weekend. This weekend is for relaxing and having fun.” Olivia turns in her seat, facing Justin and I. “Don't pull a Javen and get a chick pregnant on vacation.”

  I shake my head. Leave it Olivia to say something like that. Justin just laughs it off.

  “Hey, it wasn't just some random chick. She happened to be my wi
fe.”

  “I'll have to thank her when we get back for letting me steal you away for this amazing getaway,” she jokes.

  We spent the next few hours in the car playing the music game. I might have kicked ass and now they all give up. I'm cool with it, though. I don't have any problems with chillin out and just listen to their conversations. Honestly, I'm actually looking forward to getting the hell out of this car. I check my watch, another hour and we should be there. I'm a tall guy and being stuffed in the backseat isn't all that comfortable.

  Justin leans over and shows me his phone. It's some woman I've never seen him with before. Justin is in his mid-twenties and he is still a player. I say good for him. He has many years ahead of him to find the right girl and also many years on SWAT if he sticks with it. He doesn't tell me who she is and I don't ask. He simply takes his phone back and goes on with whatever he was doing.

  I watch out the window and Jenna crosses my mind. Hearing her voice whispering in my ear this morning freaked me out. I have not heard it in twenty-four years and it sounded just how I remembered it. She would wake me every morning since the beating I got when I wouldn't get out of bed. She didn't just whisper in my ear, she tickled my neck with a single fingernail. She knew it would wake me every time. Jenna saved my ass from future ass whoppings.

  “Abbott,” Olivia says, twisted around in her seat again.

  “Yeah?”

  “So, I met someone new at the daycare. She recently moved into the area.”

  Here we go again. Olivia loves playing cupid. I kinda wish she'd stop. I've gone out on three blind dates she's set up. Not one of her new friends are my type, especially the last girl. I'm going to have to come right out and tell her I'm not interested.

  “Baby, I'm sure Abbott can find his own women.”

  “I wasn't talking to you, Javen. Anyway, Abbott, she recently bought a house that needs some work. I was wondering if you might be interested in some side work. What you did to your place is amazing.”

  “What is she looking for?”

  “You know, manly stuff.” I give her a look. “I think she said she needs to redo her kitchen.”

  “Give her my number.”

  “Thanks.” She turns back around.

  I'm relieved I didn't have to tell her I'm not interested in her friends. Side work wouldn't be too bad. I did say I might need to find a hobby and carpentry is a skill I have, thanks to living with the Amish family. Alden was a great teacher when it came to building shit.

  We finally made it to the Outer Banks. Now that we are here, I wish I had ridden my bike. The weather is perfect and it would have been nice to have my own transportation.

  We unpack the cars and figure out who gets what room. I took the bedroom in the basement, letting the couples and Justin have the three bedrooms upstairs. They have no idea that I'm grateful for having this space to myself. It's also a benefit that I can step out onto the beach from my room if I choose.

  I start to unpack my bag, putting my clothes in the dresser and hanging my dress shirts in the closet. I then take my toiletries to my very own private bathroom. Another bonus of taking the basement. I reach into the bag and find the diary I started. Sitting down, I open the first few pages, skimming through it. No wonder Jenna was in my dream. I toss it to the bed. I wish I never started the damn thing.

  “Hey.”

  I look up to see Olivia. In the doorway. “Hey.”

  “We are going into town to grab some groceries. Is there anything special you need or want?”

  “Nah, I'm not picky. Who is going?”

  “Bill, Sandy, Javen and I. Justin is ready to hit the beach.” I get my wallet out and hand Olivia a hundred bucks. “Abbott, can I ask you something?”

  “Sure.”

  “Are you alright? I mean, you seem off.”

  “Yeah, I'm fine. Been a couple sleepless nights so I'm just tired.” I glance out the sliding door. “I think this vacation is just what I need to relax.”

  “I'm here for you if you need to talk. I know Javen always is, too.”

  “I know. Thank you.”

  “We'll be back soon. I made reservation at six for dinner.” I nod my head and she leaves.

  Olivia goes back up the stairs and I fall back onto the bed. My head rests against the diary. I get it, sitting back up and I dig into my bag for the pen I know I put in there. I open to the first blank page.

  April 7, 2019

  I had been living on the Amish farm for about four years when one day I just need to be alone for a bit. It was a very hot summer day and the heat was getting to everyone. I was up in the hayloft in the barn. It was my place to hide from everyone, even from Jenna. I knew it was the best place to be alone when nine people lived in one house. I thought I was all alone in the barn until I heard Alden’s voice yelling, then I heard Jenna’s voice yelling back. It got real quiet for a few minutes and I thought I was alone again. I was so very wrong. Once the sound echoed throughout the barn, I knew he was punishing Jenna for something. I moved real slow, careful the old wood beams didn't creek. I got to the ladder, I had enough of this bully. But, I froze at the sight before me. I could no longer make my body move. All I could do was watch. Jenna’s arms were spread and raised into the air. Baling Twine bound her wrists to support beams. Her dress was discarded on the ground and Alden was whipping her with his belt. I wanted nothing more than to go and rip his head off, then beat him with his very own belt. I was still frozen in my spot, though. I watched the belt flying through the air and smacking my best friend on the ass. He must have hit her at least fifteen times. When he stopped, she turned her head. I saw only half her face. It was weird to me, she didn't even have a tear in her eye. It actually didn't seem as if it bothered her at all. I tried to get my legs to work, but I couldn't concentrate on anything but watching what was going on down below me. Alden had untied Jenna’s wrists and then walked over to his work bench. I was mesmerized by her beautiful body and I thought she'd get dressed. I was surprised when she didn't. Instead she went and stood behind Alden, touching his skin and then she kissed his bare shoulder. What the hell, was all I could think. I reached out a hand for the ladder and that is when I knew I couldn't go down there and stop this. I was so engrossed in the scene playing out in front of me, I hadn't realized my cock was hard as fuck. It was throbbing against my jeans. I moved back away from the ladder and went back to where I hid. I tried like hell to get my cock to go soft. I closed my eyes to concentrate, but all I saw was her. There was only one thing I could do. I opened my pants, grabbed my shaft and stroked myself off until I spewed my cum all over my bare stomach. All the while, I replayed what I just witnessed in my mind. After I cleaned myself up, I felt a million different feelings. Mostly, I felt I let my best friend down. I couldn't shake the feeling that I enjoyed what I saw. I hated myself for it. It bothered me for days. Every single time I thought about it, I got hard. I was a sixteen year old boy that felt like a traitor, a horrible person and the worst friend Jenna could ever have. I couldn't look at her face to face. I couldn't even let her wake me in the morning, either. For two weeks I was up and out of bed before she could wake me. I was confused so I avoided her as much as possible. One day she confronted me when she caught me milking the cows. I made up some bullshit and blew it off like she was reading too much into it. I knew if I were too chicken shit to tell her I was spying, I had to go back to being her friend as if I never saw her and Alden in the barn.

  I close the diary and change into swimming shorts. I don't bother with shoes, I just open the sliding glass doors and step out onto the patio. I don't stretch or anything. I take off running and run until I clear my mind.

  Chapter Six

  I ran as far as I could before I fell into the sand, knees first. My legs are on fire. I'm not sure how far I've gone, but I never once slowed my pace. I ran as hard and as fast as I could. I had hoped to silence the thoughts in my head, but it hasn't helped at all. I keep seeing her in that barn and hearing her voice, t
elling me to wake up.

  I look out at the ocean and then at the beach. How did I run past so many people without realizing it? How goddamn far did I run? When I left the rental, it was just me, right?

  “Excuse me. My mommy thinks you might need this.”

  I look to my right and see a little girl holding out a bottle of water. I take it. “Thank you so much.” She runs off and I watch where she goes. I hold the bottle up and mouth thank you.

  I drink the entire bottle of water in two big gulps. It was enough to wet my whistle, but not enough for the heat. I get to my feet and walk out into the water. I dive under and cool off a bit before I begin to make my way back to the rental. On the way back, I get back into the ocean a couple more times. It's gawd awfully hot out here.

  The rental house comes into view and everyone seems to be hanging out on the patio. The two girls are under an umbrella at the table and the three guys are braving the sun. I chuckle to myself; most of the time it's the girls who want the tan. I must have been gone a while for the couples to beat me back.

  I reach the house and Javen gives me a curious look. Olivia wastes no time asking where I've been. I tell her I went for a run.

  “I saw you leave. I called out your name, but you didn't answer.”

  “Sorry, man. I guess I didn't hear you.” I really didn't hear Justin at all.

  “We are leaving for dinner in a half-hour if you’re coming with us.”

  Christ, how long was I gone? I mostly walked back and swam a bit, but I didn't think that would have taken up the entire afternoon. “I'll go shower quick.” I get to the door and I nonchalantly look over my shoulder to see how everyone is dressed; dress up it is, I guess.